In Which Arthur & Olivia Discuss The Risks Of Life In The Shadow Of An Occasionalist God
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Do you ever suspect that you might be a character in a book?

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I guess I've, uh, idly wondered, but nothing that I'd say has risen to the level of a suspicion.

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Suppose I said I suspect it.

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Then I would... walk with you down to the health center?

Why, do you suspect it?

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Aren't health centers a thing from Pokemon?

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...Sometimes I can't tell when you're messing with me.

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By design.

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That does make it somewhat harder to tell if you're, um, entirely off your gourd. 

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Don't gird at my gourd. 

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"Gird at"?

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Belittle.

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See, I know I'm not - uh, no, that doesn't work. I was going to say I couldn't be a character in a story because I'd never heard that word used in that context. But, uh, "please grip this fact with your cerebral tentacle / the doll and its maker are never identical."

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Well, how about this: it can't be that I'm from a book, because anyone who could write me would have better things to do.

Unless they're from a planet that doesn't have any big problems, I don't see how someone could get all the way through writing a book about me without running off to fix their *own* lightcone.

...Or they're writing it slowly in between other things and it's incredibly likely to wind up abandoned half-finished.

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